"Stress, you want to talk about stress? You have no idea what stress is. What I have to deal with every day at work, so I can put food on the table, keep us in a place to live and afford our cars, clothes and life, is killing me! You couldn't handle one day of my level of stress." He says.
"I'd like to see you try to do all the things that I do on a daily basis. You have NO clue! I run my business keep the house up, cook for you and the kids, run the kids around and deal with our families. You do NONE of that. All you have is work and could never deal with all the different things I have to do on a daily basis!" She says.
Are some of you thinking, "Has he been spying on us?" No, it's not you, it's all of us. We all deal with these type of issues with our significant others. What we all want is a better quality of life. Working hard, very hard, and getting yourself all stressed out, is not what life or entrepreneurship is about. Most of us don't deal with stress well and it is not good for any of us or our loved ones. Please remember my core philosophy of being a Business Owner: "Your business exists to provide you the lifestyle you desire." That means that we need to know what we desire and we have to enjoy the journey to getting there. If success if "final achievement" and that is when you are going to enjoy your success, then you are missing out on all the joys of the successes you have along the way. You do not want your journey to create more stress.
Let's first define, "more stress." There are two meanings to the word "more" in this context. More can mean number of stressors or it can mean level of stress, no matter how many stressors exist.
Women and Stress
In one of the research studies we looked at, (Polaris Marketing Research) women reported financial issues, lack of time, family problems, living situation and relationship issues as causing them stress. As a general rule women tend to deal with more stressors than men. Women have stressors such as: kids, family activity logistics, household management, cooking, shopping, husband, sex, life. What's interesting is although women deal with more stressors they also tend to be better at managing their stress. Women will talk over their issues with their friends, they more likely to sleep, listen to music, surf the Internet, socialize, read a book, or eat their favorite 'comfort foods.' Researchers from UCLA analyzed data from hundreds of biological and behavioral studies (both human and animal), they concluded that females were more likely to deal with stress by "tending and befriending" -- that is, nurturing those around them and reaching out to others.
Men and Stress
Men said that work was their main stressor. Men's top 6 stressors are: work, work, work, wife, wife, wife. (Men are not quite sure which is more stressful...however, "Happy wife, happy life" is our motto.) So what this means is that women tend to have more varied responsibility but men feel a greater need provide (financially) and keep themselves solely focused on bringing home the bacon. In terms of relieving stress, men were significantly higher in only one category, (and yes, this is embarrassing) playing video games. Men will go off by themselves to their stress relieving activity of choice. When stress get's to be too much their "fight or flight" response kicks in. Opposite of the "tend and befriend" strategy, mentioned above. (So why can't men and women get along well under times of stress?)
Men, Women and Stress
However, both men and women rated, "watching television" as their number one reliever of stress. Men and women's different reactions to stress might be more than just an interesting observation; it could account for differences in their longevity and health. "Women enjoy a greater life expectancy than men," says Shelley E. Taylor, PhD, a professor of psychology at UCLA and lead author of the study. "One reason may be that the tend-and-befriend system protects them from some of the damaging effects of stress." Not good gentlemen, not good.
Hormone's May Be To Blame
Researchers found that all signs point largely to oxytocin, a hormone that promotes both maternal and social behavior and enhances relaxation, as the key factor behind the gender difference.
When faced with stress, the body releases a number of different hormones, says Redford Williams, MD, director of the Behavioral Medicine Research Center at Duke University in Durham, N.C. Some of these hormones, notably cortisol and adrenaline, raise blood pressure and cholesterol levels and suppress the immune system, putting "often stressed" people at greater risk for everything from colds to cancer to heart disease. Some research also suggests that constant, long-term exposure to stress can lead to weight gain thanks to elevated cortisol levels.
Initially, women have the same response to stress as men, leaving them somewhat vulnerable to cortisol and adrenaline. But then women also begin secreting oxytocin from the pituitary gland, which helps scale back the production of cortisol and adrenaline, minimizing their harmful effects.
Interestingly, men also secrete oxytocin when under stress, but they produce it in lesser amounts than women do, and its effects are inhibited by male hormones such as testosterone.
The more relaxed behavior that oxytocin promotes also seems to offer some protection of its own. "Hostility has been shown over and over again to be health-damaging," says Williams. As another example of how women's convivial nature may be protective, William cites the fact that an older man's chance of dying after the death of his spouse rises substantially while a woman's risk increases only slightly. "That's probably because women access a social network to help them get through the ordeal."
So women can live longer without their mate, but men fall apart and die....very nice. Gentlemen treat your woman right or die of stress....I think that is the point of this article. Go figya!
Frank J. De Raffele Jr. is the Founder & President of Entrepreneurial Excellence Worldwide, Inc. He is the Co-Author of the #1 Best Seller, Business Networking and Sex: Not what you think., and he speaks to entrepreneurs, franchise owners and corporations around the world.
http://www.Follr.me/FrankDeRaffele
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