How Getting My Car Stolen Liberated Me

When my car was stolen, about twenty years ago, I also lost a few possessions that just happened to be in the boot (trunk) at the time. The biggest loss to me was my briefcase because it contained a folder that held all of my professional qualifications.

You know they say that every cloud has a silver lining? Well, what I wanted to mention in this post was two benefits that came about through me losing that briefcase.

The first benefit was the loss of my Lemmings codes. At the time, there was an incredible addictive computer game called Lemmings. At least, it was addictive to me because I love problem-solving. As I recall there were forty problems to solve. The basic idea was that you had to rescue these little lemmings who were intent on walking over a cliff. You had various resources at your disposal and you were required to save a percentage of them.

What happens in the game is, after you solve each problem, you get a more difficult one. They are more difficult because you have to save more lemmings with less available resources. After you had worked your way through the entire forty problems, you moved up to level 2 where you got forty more problems to solve. Level 2 was much more challenging than level 1 and, you guessed it, after you have competed level 2, you moved up to the next level. There were four levels in all.

So that you did not have to start at the beginning each time you started the game, you were given a code when you completed each problem. When you next started the game, you could enter that code and pick up from where you left off. I was about half way through the final level when my car was stolen.

It had taken me weeks of perseverance to get to that point and there was no way I was going to repeat the effort. With some problems, even after you had the right answer, you also had to get the timing right, and it could take a long time to do that. So there was the first benefit of losing that briefcase - I was finally liberated from the compulsion that I felt to finish that infuriating game.

The second benefit related to the loss of my professional qualifications. One day, after the theft, probably when we were moving house, I came across another old folder. It contained all of my school certificates from when I was a child through to leaving school. I read them with interest and a little nostalgia. What did they say? William can do very good work when he bothers to try - that kind of thing.

So was I, thinking that one day, my kids would be looking through all the junk I will have left behind me and they would read all this nonsense about how lazy their dad had been and they would not find the other folder that showed how well he had eventually managed to apply himself in life. It did not seem like a good deal to me.

So, I took them outside and put them on top of a little burner we had prepared that was loaded with a few sticks. With the flick of a match, the whole thing came to life and I stood there and watched the dry old papers burn. It gave me a great deal of satisfaction to watch those misplaced opinions of my old teachers go up in smoke. It was very cathartic.

Since then, I completed my degree, have improved my professional qualifications and have become a member of a professional body, so I now have another folder that is probably a bit fatter than the old one, so there will be some more interesting reading for my kids when the time eventually comes and, of course, I don't keep that folder in my briefcase.

So I wanted to finish by saying that I think it is true that sometimes we do receive something of real value from negative events that befall us. If you are going through a tough time at the moment, perhaps you can start looking for the silver lining. It may well be there even if it does not seem to be at first.

If you enjoyed this article, you will also enjoy The Inspiration Blog

Will Edwards is Founder of http://www.whitedovebooks.co.uk/


Original article

How to Cope With Holiday Tension: 6 Tips to Defeat Stress and Keep Your Peace

Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect. ~Oren Arnold

Have you noticed that the holidays seem to bring out the best... and worst... in people? It seems every friend, relative and client has a 'Scrooge' story to share.

Spouses who don't want the house decorated or events planned.Seniors who insist the family dinner has to be their way at their house on their schedule.Kids who expect more than their parents can provide.Grief, loneliness, depression and anger that seem to magnify during the holidays.More social events than one person could ever attend... or reciprocate.Financial pressures and excessive expectations that add more stress.Unrealistic desires for the perfect gift (given or received), perfect party, perfect holiday.

Your mind and emotions tilt into overload and the best solution seems to be - hide till it's over!

If you are one of us, it may seem like everyone wants more than you can possibly deliver, expects more than you can possibly do, and hopes you will be their source of peace, joy and fulfillment. It really is just too much...

So, how do you cope with other people's tantrums, attitudes and expectations?

Don't take it to heart. Your heart, your spirit, is the very center of your being. Protect it by giving people the benefit of mercy. There's truth in the saying, 'hurting people hurt people'. Don't absorb their pain or internalize their expectations. Tell yourself, I will not allow another person to steal my peace.

Do stay in love. No matter what you're dealing with, remember the Biblical promise, Love never fails (I Cor. 13:8). Responding with harsh words or reacting in anger will only escalate the situation. Use the God-kind of love -; always hopeful, not jealous, boastful, proud rude, or irritable (v.4-7) to keep yourself centered. Remind yourself, I am rooted and grounded in love.

Don't try to fix it. You cannot change another person's emotional turmoil no matter how much you might want to. But you can create some emotional distance for yourself. Walk away. Focus on a different activity. Adopt a 'not my responsibility' attitude.

Do remember to pray. Nothing is more powerful. Claim God's promise of peace 'My [own] peace I now give and bequeath to you... Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. [Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed...]' (John 14:27) Pray for peace and harmony for those who irritate and disturb you the most.

Don't retaliate. Acting out in your own hurt and anger will only make things worse. Practice forgiveness, patience and a great deal of self control. Let go of some of your own expectations where other people are concerned. Ask yourself, "Is being right, or being heard, more important than peace?"

Do be kind to yourself. Get enough sleep. Take breaks throughout the day. Listen to favorite music. Laugh out loud. Dance. Sing. Buy yourself a present! Proverbs 17 reminds us that 'a merry heart is good medicine' (v. 22). That's true for spiritual and emotional health as well as physical well-being. A merry heart can also be contagious; so be a carrier of joy and good will.

No matter what pressures you face this season, remember the real reason we celebrate. Remind yourself that, like Abraham, you have more blessings than the lights on your tree (or the stars in the sky). Rejoice in and be grateful for the true Spirit of Christmas.

For more information on developing life skills, better relationships, and becoming the best YOU possible, visit http://www.seebecksolutions.com/ and sign up to receive your FREE subscription to "What Matters Most", a weekly ezine of inspiration, motivation and humor from a Christian perspective.

Ruth Seebeck has built a reputation over the last three decades as a life-skills coach, mentor, Christian counselor and friend. She is a business owner, author, community volunteer and event coordinator whose passion is helping others overcome life's challenges.


Original article

Keep Holiday Stress in Perspective

It's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of these busy weeks leading into the holidays so be sure to take time out to think about what the season means to you and what you want it to mean to your family.

Here are a few ideas to help keep that holiday stress in perspective:
Take a few minutes each day to reflect on yourself and your family. What can you do to make this the best holiday season ever? I'm not talking about spending money or purchasing anything for that matter. What I'm talking about is "what can you do to make family time even better" right now.Take an extra 15-30 minutes each evening to have a discussion with your spouse, kids, loved ones. Ask about their day; tell them about your day. Ask open ended questions so that you get more than a yes or no answer. Have an actual discussion! Here are a few examples to get you started:

- What happened today that was surprising?

- What was the best part of your day?

- What wasn't so great today?

- How can tomorrow be better?

- What are you most excited about for the holidays?

Having these conversations is a great way to establish that connection so many people desire, especially during the holidays when everyone is so busy. Take time out for those that you love.
Our time is precious, especially now. We can easily get overwhelmed with all the demands on our time so whether it's volunteering or just too many parties to attend, remember that it's okay to say no.Reconnect with those that are important to us. If it's been awhile since you've been in touch with someone, send a card, an e-mail or just pick up the phone. The holidays are a wonderful time to reconnect with those we've lost touch with.If we feel the stress of it all becoming too much, take time out for yourself! If you need to go to your room for some quiet reflection, take a walk to get some fresh air or talk to a friend just to vent, do it. We are not helping our families if we are not taking care of ourselves. By taking care of ourselves, we are also teaching our children that self care is important too.

Once we get through the holidays then we can start thinking about the New Year. Don't stress about that before you need to. It's a whole new year coming so be sure to keep your stress levels low and you will be off to a great start to the New Year!

Tammy Potosky (Teen Coach Tammy) is a teen and parenting life coach and learning professional. She works with teens and young adults empowering them to make better choices and live successful lives. Her mission is to: help teens feel more comfortable with themselves and to get along better with friends and others; assist in identifying their life goals and direction; prepare young adults to have the life skills needed to achieve their goals in life; and for parents to help maintain balance and enjoy life with their teens and all life has to offer. Tammy helps her clients achieve these results through one-on-one coaching, group coaching and workshops. For more information please visit http://www.teencoachtammy.com/.


Original article

6 Ways to Find Stillness During the Holidays

Is it possible to actually feel peace and calm during one of the busiest times of the year... the holiday season?

I am going to challenge you to let go of the idea that it is impossible and go with me on just the possibility. The possibility to create stillness for a few minutes each day during the holiday season. Creating stillness is so beneficial to your overall well-being. While the holidays are often filled with joy, love and laughter, spending time with family and friends, there is also the feelings of being overwhelmed and anxious that can overtake the joy of the season. Often instead of enjoying the beauty of this time of year, we are racing around from here to there and checking off our list of things to do.

If you are thinking there is no way you can create stillness during this time of year, try not to rule it out completely. There are several ways I am going to share with you in an effort to help you find one that will work for you. When we create more stillness in our life whether it is during the holiday season or not, it has huge benefits for us.

Having quiet moments with ourselves can often:

Reduce our stress levels.
Help us feel calmer.
Actually be enjoyable.
Bring us to the present moment instead of thinking about the past and worrying about the future.
Create an overall feeling of gratitude.

It can be hard to get quiet and just be, even for just a couple of minutes. But a couple of minutes can and will do you wonders this holiday season or any time of the year if you give it a try.

A few ways to create stillness in your life:

Breathing. So many of us hold our breath or take short breaths and rarely take a second to inhale deeply and exhale fully. Simply breathing deeply in and out will help you create a few seconds of stillness. It calms the mind and brings more oxygen into your body. This can be done while you are driving or at a stop light. Create stillness through your breath. Allow yourself to stop and inhale and exhale deeply.

Focus. Stop and focus on one thing wherever you are. If you are in your house focus on a chair, and repeat "chair" over a few times in your mind. When you do this you instantly come into the present moment. Move from the chair to another object in the room and in your mind repeat what that object is in your mind. While you are focusing, you are creating stillness in the present moment. You are no longer thinking about anything else but the object you are focusing on and while you are doing that you are creating stillness.

Light a candle. The flame of a candle can be somewhat meditative on it's own. As you light the candle sit quietly and watch the flame. If you can breath deeply while you do this even better. Candles can help create peace and calmness the minute they are lit.

Observe. If you are at a holiday party or gathering allow yourself a moment to just observe your surroundings. Take it all in. Take in the people, the food or decorations. Look around and really see your surroundings. Notice all the colors, the laughter, the conversations, the food. As you take it all in and observe you are creating a moment of stillness.

Meditate. Many people are intimidated by meditation, and often aren't sure how to even get started. Meditation can be healing and it will help you create stillness not only during your meditation but throughout your day. There are many ways you can meditate. A popular way to meditate is through a guided mediation. There are many guided meditation apps that you download and use very easily. If you aren't interested in a guided mediation you can try counting your breaths with your eyes closed. As you inhale count 1, and then exhale 1 and continue until you reach 11 and start all over. Try sitting in silence and letting all the stuff in your mind float by as if they were clouds. Meditation does not have to be 45 minutes in length. Try 5 minutes and work your way up by adding 5 more minutes every now and then.

Walking outside. Although in many places the weather is getting colder and snow is just around the corner, walking outside can help you create stillness. Try walking outside at night after a snowfall. It is an amazing feeling of stillness.

Take seconds, minutes or even an hour and give yourself the opportunity to create more stillness in your life this holiday season. Watch how you become more present in the moment and feel calmer during this busy time of year. Enjoy the stillness.

Carrie Saba, Holistic Health Coach, helps others see their inner strength through a new light. She offers valuable insight & lifestyle tips in her free monthly ezine, Wellness Tips with Carrie, as well as on her blog. Carrie believes our spirit is fed on how we think, what we experience, and eat. She empowers her clients and believes everyone should know their brilliance and enjoy life! Learn more about Carrie by visiting her website.


Original article

How To Reduce Stress in 5 Minutes! Get Grounded!

One quick, amazing way to release stress is to practice grounding yourself. You may have heard of this idea before. But how often do you actually do it?

It is a great tool for dealing with stress and only needs to take up 5 minutes of your time. When undertaken regularly it can really make a difference to your emotional and mental state of being. It can reduce the stress that may be causing your head to spin and also allow you to connect with your body. Many people spend most of their day detached and disconnected from their physical body. They are too busy "doing," too busy thinking about what they need to next or too busy thinking about what a certain person said or did to them. By grounding yourself you will reconnect with your body and this has numerous great benefits.

• It will help you to take a breather and become aware of the constant dialogue going on in your mind.

• It will have a calming; soothing effect on your emotions.

• It will help to strengthen your immune system

• You will breath more deeply and this will have a more energizing effect on your body.

• By doing this you will be practicing the art of being present. This is a wonderful gift to give yourself. Being fully conscious in the present moment allows us to really stop and take stock of our lives and what is going on for us. It also helps to be more appreciative of everything we have, our environment and other people in our lives.

• It helps to reduce anxiety by taking your attention away from the thing you are worrying about.

As a Yoga and Meditation Teacher I often ask my students to ground themselves in the following way:

1. Sit or stand with a nice straight back. Start to notice where your body is in contact with the ground. Notice the soles of your feet or your buttocks. Really try to place all your attention and focus into any area of your body that is touching the floor.

2. Each time your mind wanders (it will do, and that is perfectly normal!) just bring it back to your focus - the parts of your body in contact with the ground.

3. Now imagine that you have roots growing downwards from your body into the ground. Imagine them growing and spreading all the way down into the centre of the earth.

4. Take a deep breath in and imagine yourself breathing in all the positive energy and life force from the earth.

5. As you exhale deeply, imagine releasing all of your unwanted stress and tension, anything unwanted. Any negativity is released into the earth and transmuted.

6. Keep noticing your feet/buttocks and where they are in contact with the ground.

7. Repeat for as long as it feels great!

When you first start to introduce the practice of grounding into your life you may find that you come up against a certain amount of mental resistance. Your mind will be keen to tell you that you need to keep working. Just be aware of this, be prepared for it. By doing this you will be better equipped to push through it and the benefits will be well worth it.

Also watch out for your mind's cunning attempt to convince you that 5 minutes of grounding will not make a difference and so what's the point!? People often complain that they don't have enough time to take time out to look after themselves. This is often because they think it must involve an hour or more of their time. But if we can realize that reducing our stress levels only needs to take 5 minutes and that it is the small regular habits, which make all the difference to our health and well-being, then we have at our hands a great tool for achieving a greater sense of balance and harmony in our life.

I am passionate about helping people to feel good about themselves and their lives. I love that coaching enables me to see people at their most amazing selves,! I am a qualified Life Coach, Yoga and Meditation teacher. I enjoy working with a number of UK Television personalities and coach individuals from all walks of life.
Ways to reduce stress


Original article

Working Out for the Over-Worked

For the over-worked, there is a good chance that time at the gym may be one of the first things to fall off of the calendar when time is running short and energy levels are low. However, there are many reasons to prioritize your workout as a way to deal with, and reduce your stress.

There have been obvious linkages between working out and stress relief. Working out reduces stress hormones like Cortisol and increases endorphins which give your mood a natural boost. However, working out can also reduce stress in some not-so-obvious ways for those that are over-worked.

For the over-worked, not getting enough sleep may be a common occurrence. A benefit from working out is that even 20-30 minutes of exercise a day can lead to deeper sleep at night. So even if you aren't able to get as much sleep as you need, you will feel more rested if you are exercising during the day.

For many people, especially women, shopping for clothes and figuring out what to wear each day can take additional time if you are not happy with your appearance. For those that are overworked, being confident and happy with your appearance can reduce the time it takes to get ready in the morning and can alleviate this potential stressor from your day. Feeling good about how you look, together with feeling confident about your ability to do your job, will help the over-worked to tackle the challenges they face and be successful.

Many people that are over-worked feel like they do not have enough time to spend with friends or their significant other. Spending time with the ones you love helps to reduce stress and maintain your focus on what is important in life. When time is short, a great way to reconnect is to become workout buddies. This way, you can take advantage of the great benefits of working out and have time to connect with your friends or significant other on a routine basis. Just make sure to not talk about work the whole time you are at the gym. In addition, be respectful. If you are the one speaking, do not expect an immediate answer while the other is performing a set; let them focus on their breathing and motions.

Working out might not be high on the priority list for the over-worked but there are many benefits that should not be ignored. Having a workout routine and sticking with it can help to reduce stress, improve sleep, increase confidence, and maintain relationships.

Need more tips or ideas on where to get started with your exercise plan to reduce stress? Check out a variety of exercises at http://www.chunkfitness.com/exercises. All exercises are broken down by muscle group with listings of primary, secondary, and tertiary muscles worked. Not only will you feel better mentally, but you'll start to look better physically. Take it from me, this is a great online resource to use.


Original article

3 Holiday Simplifying Tips

In the month of December, there seems to be a never-ending list of things to do and places we need to be. We often try to cram things in to ensure we're doing it all and seeing it all. As a result, December can be a stressful time for individuals and families. There are Christmas concerts at school, shopping, baking, sending out cards, etc. This year, pull out some of the stress that the season may bring by doing the following:

1. Say 'No' and 'Yes' - Between all the company parties, school activities and family get-togethers, trying to fit it all in can be tricky. Be realistic about your time and the effect it has on your family. Being out every night of the week is not good for families with school-aged kids. As you receive invitations to outings, check your calendar first. First, ensure there are no conflicts. Secondly, do not fill in every open spot on your calendar. Ask yourself if the event is adding value to you and your family. Say 'yes' to the activities you truly enjoy, and politely say, 'no' to the ones that you could do without.

2. Delegate - Have you ever heard, 'If it's not done my way, then I'll just have to do it myself." The reality is: if you want it done your way, and only your way, then you are going to be the one to do it! Let go of some of the perfectionism and allow people to help. It is not a bad reflection of your housekeeping if you get a cleaning company to do a 'once over' on your home before company arrives. It's not a bad reflection on you if you hire a personal chef to do your baking! Perhaps your spouse does not clean the bathroom like you may. So what! It's time to let that go. If you are lucky, you can often delegate within your own home. Other times, it's well worth the money to hire help to do the work!

3. Be Financially Responsible - Every family has their own budget. Avoid the temptation of running out to the store to get all those great sale items every time you receive a flyer. As you may or may not be aware, buying items is eventually going to create clutter. Clutter takes up space, time and energy and costs money! What's important to remember around this time of year is to work within your budget. Set a budget and stick to it!

Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Sheri Bruneau is the owner of Get It Together Inc. and is a Professional Organizer. Information about Get It Together Inc. can be found at http://www.get-it-together.ca/


Original article

Top Ten Tips For Getting Rid Of Exam Stress

1. Choose A Suitable Place Of Study
It is important to find a place of study that you are comfortable with, and where there are no distractions. Many people, particularly mature students with families and responsibilities, find it difficult to study at home, where demands from husband or wife and children can get in the way of academic work. The place of study you choose should be somewhere you are comfortable with and where you can work quietly with minimum distraction. Ideally this place should solely be used for study, so that you do not associate other activities with this environment. This is important because simply by entering the study room or area, signals are automatically sent to the subconscious mind that you are preparing to study and your subconscious will prepare you for the processes of concentration and memorizing your material. It is vital that you rest the mind at least 10 minutes every hour, so look to leaving your study area when you do this and spend time doing something that takes your mind away from study, for example, making a cup of tea or taking a walk in the garden. It is also useful to allocate a certain time for study and to stick to this time everyday.

2. Concentrate On The Material You Need To Learn
It is important to focus solely on the material that you need to learn in order to pass your exam. Many of us lose focus and start reading material that we may find interesting but which has no relevance to what we will be tested upon. Make a list of revision targets before each study session and stick to these. Improve your concentration through relaxing yourself before you begin to study. You can do this by taking a few slow, deep breaths, concentrating only on the 'in breath' and the 'out breath', acknowledging any thoughts that arise, thanking them and then letting them float away like balloons.

3. Avoid Putting Too Much Pressure On Yourself
This is a common problem associated with exam failure or underperformance. If you are a perfectionist you will probably put too much pressure on yourself to achieve well. This will in turn, increase the amount of anxiety and stress in your mind and body which will be detrimental to your study routines, lowering concentration and memory retention capabilities, and ultimately leading to poor, anxious ridden, performance in the exam itself. In order to maximize concentration and memory retention you need to lose the anxiety behind trying to be perfect and aim for something lower and more realistic as a target. Sometimes it is sufficient just to get through an exam, without worrying about breaking any records of achievement.

4. Get Rid Of Any Negative Emotions That Stop You From Studying
Fear of failure is a massive barrier to efficient revision and should be dealt with before starting any successful study regime. A good way to achieve this is to take a few deep breaths and picture a white cloud somewhere in the distance. Spend a few minutes filling the cloud with any negative thoughts you may have about learning new material or fears about failure, until the cloud is black with all negative thoughts filling it. Next picture a bright sun behind the cloud, gradually growing larger until the black cloud disappears. The sun represents your confident, positive self and shows you that you are now ready to study.

5. Learn To Focus The Mind Through Breathing
Relax before each session by taking slow deep breaths, focusing on the 'in breath' and 'out breath' as you do so. Acknowledge any thoughts that arise, thank them and then picture them floating away like balloons. Doing this exercise a few minutes before starting to study should focus the mind on the task ahead, while also relaxing the body. Focus on relaxing all your muscles as you continue with the breathing exercise.

6. Sleep On It
How many of us have stayed up all night, cramming before an exam, only to find that our recall becomes muddled and inconsistent when we start the actual examination? A little revision often is much better than cramming. Also it is recommended that you get a good night's sleep after revising, and before the exam the next day. This is because it takes time for your brain to organize all the information you need to know correctly and to make the correct associations between this information and any imagery, for example, that you may have used in order to boost your memory retention. View your mind as containing a library of information at your fingertips - if you cram information you don't allow the library assistant in your mind enough time to place each bit of information on the correct shelf in the correct aisle.

7. Let Go Of Stress And Tension Before Your Exam
You can take the above breathing exercises with you as you enter the examination room, focusing on taking deep, refreshing breaths of air as you sit down in front of the desk. In this way you prepare yourself for maximum performance, just like a sprinter gathers him/herself before exploding off the blocks.

8. Breathe Deeply And Relax Your Muscles
Once again, a reference to the importance of breathing. Because you have associated slow, deep breathing with relaxing your muscles (see Tip 5 above), your muscles should automatically relax as soon as you take in a deep breath. Focus lovingly on any muscle groups that are tense and picture them smooth and relaxed. Also, if you have any butterflies, focus lovingly on the muscles of your stomach, making them loose and relaxed and letting go of your butterflies.

9. Read Through Each Question Before You Begin
Don't start writing straight away. Read through each question before you begin the exam. The questions may not make any sense to you but don't worry - trust in your subconscious to make available to you the correct and appropriate information for each answer. Once you have read through all the questions, you are ready to begin writing the answers down.

10. Let Your Knowledge Flow Out Of You
Don't try too hard to access the information from the library in your brain. It will flow out of you naturally as you begin to write your first answer. Once this flow of knowledge dries up, move onto the next question and once more allow the flow of information to surface. Once you have gone through all the questions, check your answers and relax.

Enjoy taking exams like never before!

Mark Spalek is a Clinical Hypnotherapist and NLP Practitioner with his own practice based in Leicester, UK. Mark is registered with the General Hypnotherapy Register (validated by the General Hypnotherapy Standards Council) and adheres to its strict Code of Ethics. He is continually driving his therapeutic techniques forward through innovation, research and dedication. Mark also produces an excellent range of self-hypnosis CD's for clients who cannot make it to his office and also offers remote therapy through Skype for clients around the world.

http://www.hypnotherapy-in-leicester.co.uk/


Original article

We Wish You a "Mary" Christmas

It's that time of the year again when the list of things to be done grows by the minute, plans are changed again and again until the last minute, and stress over finances, family, and friends is at an all time high. There is too much to do, too much to see, too many places to be, and far too many expectations to be met. The demands of work, family, friends, and even church push us to a panic frenzy to meet and exceed those demands but at what expense?

When did this season, the season of joy, the season of celebration, the season of giving and the season of bonding become the season of anxiety over unmet expectations and financial pressure, the season of depression over the loss of loved ones, and the season of trampling over others to make a purchase? "Merry Christmas" is not so merry anymore. Rather than trying to put the "Merry" back into Christmas, I would propose a different type of "Mary". Jesus refers to Mary in Luke 10:38-42 when he informs Martha that she is worried and upset over the details of preparing a meal while her sister Mary sits a listens to Him talk. She has chosen the better path, one of quiet listening instead of hurrying around.

Has anyone seen my calendar? Take a moment to glance over your calendar right now and see just how full it is with events, parties, and special gatherings. If it is like mine, it is frightening and double booked for several nights and events. With all of this running around there is not much time to sit and reflect on the true purpose of Christmas and even less time devoted to spending with just your immediate family. But you can choose the Mary way instead of the Martha way by adjusting your calendar to spend more time with the most important people in your life.

Can you ever have enough Christmas decorations? Yes Christmas decorations are fun and do help to put you in the mood for Christmas but when you find yourself angry at your spouse for not helping with the outside lights, frustrated at the kids for breaking a favorite ornament, or annoyed at the cat for destroying the bottom of yet another tree, they are adding to your stress level. Decorations are meant to be fun but if they are not, then don't add them. Martha would be decorating and redecorating, Mary would not.

Of course we are doing another family picture with Santa! Family pictures are frequently exchanged this time of year and they are always full of smiles and happy faces but life is rarely full of smiles and happy faces. In fact, I have yet to know of a family who does not go through some struggle in any given year yet we pretend that everything is fine. This is most hurtful to those who have lost a loved one in the last year and are still struggling with grief. Martha tried to live up to everyone else's expectations by preparing a great meal, but Mary chose to focus on the one person that mattered most, Jesus.

This year take some time to evaluate your traditions and expectations. Read the section in Luke about Mary and Martha and ask yourself, are you more like Mary or Martha? Then make the better choice.

Chris Hammond is a Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern at LifeWorks Group w/ over 15 years of experience as a counselor, mentor & teacher for children, teenagers & adults.

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Original article

Use of Massage in Relieving Stress

Anyone who has experienced a good massage session can say that it relaxed them. This relaxation will then help relieve a person from the stress that he or she is feeling. There are several massage therapies that can relax the different parts of the body.

For anyone who works in front of the computer for the whole day, tiredness of the eyes will be the most common problem. In order to remove eye strain and increase the circulation on this part of the body, you can make use of these massage techniques.

Start by assuming a comfortable position and closing your eyes. You will be using your thumbs to massage the delicate muscles around the eyes. Hold your thumbs against each other over your eyebrows. Then, move them outwards while doing a slow and soft massage. The pressure that you will use should be minimal as the muscles in this area are not as rigid as on the other parts of the body. Continue the same movements until you have done the area surrounding the eyes. End near the bridge of your nose.

Repeat the process a couple of times until you feel that your eyes and the muscles around it are pretty much relaxed. For good measure, take some more time to close your eyes or even take a short nap to completely remove the eye strain.

For those who experience splitting headaches, a simple massage may be able to alleviate your suffering. For this, you will still be using your fingers. Position them next to your cheekbones adjacent to your ears. Then, you will be applying some pressure to your skull using your fingers. Assume a gradual, repetitive motion of your fingers.

As you are starting from your hairline, you have to end somewhere in the middle of your head where your fingers meet. Increase the pressure as you see fit. Some people are comfortable with very minimal amount of pressure. There are also individuals who prefer to like a firmer push on their scalp.

Make sure that you massage your whole head. And for best results, do this massage on a regular basis. Do not wait for your headaches to come before you think about massaging your head.

In everyday of our lives, the hands are the most overworked and most used body part. Thankfully, there are methods that can help your hands relax. Start by stretching your wrist and your digits. Hold your hands together and rub one finger after another until you finish all the fingers in both hands. Also massage the inner and outer parts of your hand. Use the thumb and fingers of the opposite hand to press and apply pressure to these parts.

Then, there are also measures that one can use to relieve tension from the neck and shoulders. Letting another person massage this part of the body will be great. But even if you are all alone, there are a few things that you can try. Assume a comfortable position while keeping your back straight and your shoulders squared. Glide your fingers on one side of your shoulders. Gently increase the pressure until the tension is relieved.

Marion Mccants enjoys writing about sanyo massage chair review and home massage chair as well as related products.


Original article

Practical Stress Reduction Tips

Managing your stress level is an important factor to living a healthy and happy life that is often ignored. Most will simply accept the stress rather than try to find ways to reduce it.

However, you should not take stress so lightly. Yes, stress is a natural part of life that everybody experiences and has to deal with in one way or another but there are simple things you can do to help reduce stress or at least manage it better. Taking the steps necessary to manage your stress level will lower your blood pressure, lead to higher energy levels and many other benefits to your health and overall well-being.

Below are a few simple but powerful tips to help you reduce stress in your life.

Eat Healthier & Exercise

It may sound cliche but eating healthier and exercising are the two best things you can do to manage your stress. And mostly everyone already knows this intuitively; treat your body right, give it the nutrients it needs, and it will operate better and more efficiently. The problem comes with actually taking the initiative or finding the motivation to eat healthier and exercise more.

Making dramatic changes to your diet and exercise routine can be an added factor to stress in and of itself, so you'll want to make very small incremental changes. This not only makes such changes easier to handle and less stressful but it also makes those changes more likely to stick and become a habit. Do a few pushups in the morning at first, take the stairs instead of the elevator, add a banana or an apple to your lunch. Start making these very small changes and add on as time goes on.

De-clutter and Organize

You'd be surprised how much a difference it can make in reducing your stress by simply cleaning up and organizing your home and office. Living in a chaotic mess seems to reflect itself in our lives. Most people find that simply removing the clutter on their desk will improve their mindset and help boost productivity.

Being disorganized also leads to more stress in certain situations, such as when you can't find your car keys in the morning and you end up running late to work. Or perhaps you need to find an important paper or report but it is lost somewhere in the stack of papers on your desk. You can remove little stressors like these that add to your overall stress level simply by becoming more organized.

Take Your Sleep Seriously

Lack of quality sleep is one of the biggest factors to stress and yet it is the one most ignored. You can get through your day with only four hours of sleep, sure, but it is going to negatively affect your health and add to your stress.

Researchers are continually confirming and uncovering new negative affects of sleep deprivation.

If you find yourself having trouble getting to sleep there are free resources available on the internet that may help. The common tips to falling asleep easier include:

1) Don't drink any caffeinated beverages 3 to 6 hours before you plan to go to sleep.

2) Avoid electronic screens such as computers or television 30 minutes to an hour before you plan to go to sleep because electronic light exposure before sleep disrupts natural body rhythms, excites your visuals and suppresses the release of the hormone melatonin which promotes sleep.

3) Try different relaxation techniques such as meditation.

4) Try reading a book in bed before going to sleep. Reading often helps people become drowsy and the drowsy effect is increased by reading in your bed.

5) If you don't feel tired when you plan to go to sleep, simply lay in bed and close your eyes and try not to think about anything. You may find that you'll soon become tired this way and is a better option than turning on the tube which, like mentioned, disrupts your quality of sleep and makes you even less tired.

Get a New Hobby or Join a Group

New experiences or taking up a fun hobby can dramatically reduce stress. Pick up hiking as an outdoor recreational activity for example. Studies actually show that getting out into nature can have a positive effect on our moods. Or you could join a book club or some other group activity. Having fun and enjoying yourself with hobbies and activities is a great way to reduce stress and enhance the quality of your life.

Quit Destructive Habits

If you drink too much alcohol or smoke cigarettes you may want to consider reducing if not stopping these habits completely. Smoking cigarettes actually does help reduce stress while you are smoking them but cigarettes damage your blood vessels and nerve endings which consequently lead to more overall stress. Alcohol has a similar effect as cigarettes. It may temporarily reduce your stress in the moment but the health disruption it can cause may lead to a net increase in your stress level.

Other destructive habits may include eating unhealthy, over-spending or procrastination. Look for areas where you can improve yourself. Setting goals and reaching for excellence makes you feel better about yourself and will ultimately lead to less stress.

Here's an extra tip: An at-home foot massager is a great way to relax and reduce stress. Interested? Read some foot massager reviews to find yourself the most relaxing foot massaging device.


Original article

Self-Calming Activities Provide Cure for Stress

What's on Your Mind This Morning?

What did you wake up thinking about this morning? Were you calm or stressed as you thought about it?

Whichever way we start--calm or stressed-- it usually builds momentum and determines the course of our day. It's just the way our brains work--stress begets stress, and calm begets calm.

Self-Calming Activities Provide the Cure

Like you, I have to figure out how to get myself out of that overwhelmed feeling when a bout of life hits. I have a low tolerance for discomfort. I hate feeling overwhelmed, and I'm very motivated to get out of it as fast as I can.

To return to being clear and focused sooner, I've learned to engage in self-calming activities when overwhelmed. It's a simple, effective strategy for redirecting my focus, and I make good and reasoned choices when I'm calm.

Heart Rate over 100? Kiss Your Ability to Think Clearly Good-Bye!

John Gottman, a professor of psychology at the University of Washington, and co-founder and co-director of the Gottman Institute, studies couples to determine what makes for harmonious relationships and what gets in the way. Use of self-calming techniques is part of the answer to what makes for more harmonious relationships.

As part of his research, Gottman takes physiological recordings, including heart rate and blood pressure readings to determine how stressed or relaxed couples are while talking to each other.

Gottman has shown when our heart rate goes above 100 in non-exercise situations, such as when engaged in an argument with a spouse, our brains go diffuse. In other words, our ability to problem-solve or think clearly flies out the window, and fear and irrationality move in.

In order to bring their heart rates down so they can think more clearly and problem solve more effectively, Gottman teaches couples to pause and practice self-calming techniques when their emotions cause their heart rate to raise above 100.

You Know Best What Calms You

What are self-calming activities for you? You know best what will calm and relax you. It's anything you can engage in that redirects your attention away from the stress to a calmer state. This activity can take as little as 5-10 minutes, or it can be sleeping on it overnight.

Try one of the self-calming activities below, or use one of your own making, and see what happens. Life is too short to live it tied up in knots. Take steps to improve your life daily.

Self-Calming Activities

Take a Walk

Take a Break

Take a Nap

Take a Shower

Take a Bath

Take Action

Laugh with Friends

Play a Game

Read a Book

Write in a Journal

Brew some Tea

Nourish your Body

Make a List

Talk with a Friend

Get the Facts

Take a step

Put it down

Do Something Else

Sleep on it

Give it Time

Let it Go

Ask for Help or Advice.

Do you need help moving yourself out of feeling overwhelmed by your situation into a calmer, more productive and peaceful state of mind? For more than 25 years, Susan Meyerott has been helping people lighten up and step over invisible barriers to change one step at a time. She speaks to your heart, puts you at ease, and makes changing easier than ever before. http://lightartedliving.blogspot.com/2011/07/key-to-empowered-life-still-mind.html

http://www.linkedin.com/in/susanjmeyerott


Original article

What's The One Little Word That Could Magically Create More Time This Christmas?

It doesn't matter how well-prepared we are for Christmas, if we don't know the one little word that can create more time, then we're likely to end up stressed and exhausted.

This magic little word has the power to set us free from things that aren't really our job, to save us having to run extra errands and to avoid overwhelm and running around like a crazy thing.

But there's a catch.

It's the one word that most of us find hardest to say, especially when everyone is busy.

Yes, this one is a toughie for many of us. There's no point in softening the blow or wrapping it up in gift paper with a pretty bow.

Here's the one little word you need to say, to dramatically increase your time and cut your Christmas stress:

No.

Yes, I said "Say no!"

I'm not talking about getting angry when you say it or waiting till you're ready to snap. I'm talking about saying 'no' early enough that you don't ever make it to 'blow your fuse' territory.

You might want to:

Say no to extra hours at work.Say no to extra gift shopping.Say no to extra parties.Say no to ironing (my personal favourite 'no'!)Say no to extra baking

Say no to anything that doesn't feel like it "belongs to you" - anything that isn't really your job, even if it is something you would usually say 'yes' to. And we each know what our personal 'yes' habits are!

A friend of mine used to say:

"If you want something to get done, give it to a busy person."

And there's an element of truth in that, unless the busy person is about to crack, in which case things can get very messy.

So if you're in the middle of everything and someone comes to you with yet another request, take a moment to stop and think about whether you really want to take it on.

There's no law saying you have to do extra Christmas preparation, especially if it means you're risking your peace of mind

And if you don't want to take on the extra job, play with politely, but firmly, saying no! The other person might be shocked. They might even react grumpily, if they can't see things from your perspective. But:

If you truly want to cut your stress levels this Christmas, then saying 'no' more often is the way to go.

Want to find out more about Christmas stress and what you can do about it?

Then you might want to have a flick through "101 Ways To De-Stress Your Christmas". No matter which type of Christmas stress you've got, there's something in it for everyone.

It's based on practical psychology, stress management techniques, sleigh-fulls of common sense and a good dose of Christmas humour. Find out more at http://www.destressyourchristmas.com/

From Clare Josa: Author, NLP trainer, Meditation Teacher, Expert Mentor ~ Beyond Alchemy


Original article

Hurry Up and Get Organized - The Family Is Visiting for the Holidays

Okay, I'm sure the panic is just starting to creep up! It is inevitable, the holidays are here! Hanukah and Christmas parties have already started. Cards are starting to show up in the mail. You're feeling pressured to shop, clean, organize, cook and get all the holiday gear out and up. I know because I am feeling it too.

I started preparing and getting things done earlier this year then ever before... maybe because I am 50 years old now, and I just can't afford to stroke out over Santa and burnt out bulbs. I also decided to downsize some of the hoopla. Instead of unpacking all the Christmas/Hanukah Holiday stuff, I kept it simple and put out about half the trinkets and decor. I also strung only half the lights around the house and garden then I normally would hang. I used the tiniest fake Christmas tree for our official tree this year. Normally I make a huge plate of Latkes (painstaking potato pancakes), and this year I bought them from a woman who makes them way better then I do. In our home we celebrate Hanukah and Christmas so it can get complicated. This year I did not let that happen. A Menorah here and a Santa there, not the gazillion items I usually put out, and the house still looks, smells, and feels like the holidays. And I feel more rested and at ease then I have ever felt during these hectic holiday happenings.

When I have discussed with friends, family and clients about easing it up a bit around the holidays I usually hear the heavy hearted whine about "doing it for the kids". Well, let me tell you, having your kids watch you spaz out about what tree to buy, where to put it, what to put on it, hunting down the dreidel from Aunt Ida, while drowning in butter cookie dough, is not what makes them feel warm and cuddly. Do you really think they are enjoying watching you have a Merry Melt Down? No, the kids would rather see you relaxed, communicative and well MERRY. Take a sip of that good ol' fashion... ol' fashion.

In the ol' days, we just did not have that much stuff. We had one nice dress or suit to wear. One dressy shoe choice to put on our feet. We had one tree, one Menorah, a few candles, one wreath, one Dreidel, and a very few presents around that tree, mostly consisting of what we actually needed like clothing, shoes, food items and necessities. The holiday celebration of today has become so large, fast and furious it is like a heart thumping marathon, ending with a meal that would give most people heart pains and indigestion. It just starts to feel so overwhelming and stressful it takes the "holi" and of holiday and that leaves "day", just another day of stress, strategies and desire for sleep!

This year take it easy, and don't use the kids, Martha Stewart's latest Christmas articles, or the neighbor's neon holiday front yard displays as a push to push you over. I always say if you push, you fall. And remember we are going into another seasonal change....Winter.

Winter will be on December 22nd this 2011 so enjoy the end of fall without falling down. Clown around more, talk to more friends on the phone instead of texting, have a potluck holiday dinner instead of putting in all on your shoulders and just sit with your kids and talk about the spiritual aspect of the holidays and why they started in the first place! Put things into perspective when it comes to spending and giving. Give to a charity, especially the homeless around the holidays. Know how fortunate you are and have gratitude for a new year to come!

Marla Stone is the owner of I-Deal-Lifestyle A Self and Space Organizing Company. Marla Stone is an actress, author, Lifestyle Expert and public speaker.


Original article

Reduce Bad Stress: 5 Ways That Will Enable You to Do That and Live Healthier

You just arrived at your job and found out that there's going to be a takeover and that certain positions will be eliminated. You don't know if your position is one of them. Your heart starts beating and all kinds of things will go through your mind. Including what would happen if you were to lose your job.

What happened is that you just went into a fight or flight state. This is simply a leftover from our primitive ancestors when they to deal with hunting for food and to fight wild animals. Our brains are basically the same as they were back in those days. We still react as if losing our job was like facing death. This is the nature of today's stressful environment.

Stress can be negative or positive. Hans Selye described the differences in his book, The Stress of Life. Since stress is usually associated with being bad, this article will address that aspect. Though, I will explain the differences. Distress is what is known as the bad stress. It's usually emotionally based and triggers both adrenaline and cortisol to be released. Eustress is the good kind of stress. This will come from physical activity or from challenges.

In fact, some of the good stress can be a counter measure to bad stress. It's sort of like a balancing act. Our ancestors were able to release any distress by having to directly fight the wild animal and make their way back to their camp or home. It was a part of their everyday living. Hunting for food, as they had to walk many miles, also helped with distress. Today we don't have the luxury of this type of stress release. Nowadays, all we have to do is to go to the local market and buy our food.

So let me tell you the 5 ways to reduce distress and help you to live a healthier and happier life.

1. Start exercising. Exercise is like the eustress I mentioned earlier. As a counterbalance to distress, exercise has many other benefits. This includes the release of beta-endorphins, a natural pain reliever. And the more high intense the exercise, the more beta-endorphins are released. Exercise has also been shown to grow the brain through neurogenesis.

2. Get into meditation and self-hypnosis. Both are focused on the mental relaxation of our minds. When we do this, our stress tends to go down. This is especially true when one practices mindfulness as part of their meditation. Simply staying in the present moment will help to reduce distress that occurs from worrying about the future or what you could have done in the past.

3. Journal your stressful feelings. Writing down how you feel will enable you to deal with it outside of your mind. Sometimes we have to simply step back and see the reality of it. That it's simply just our mind that manifests the distress and not something that is going to kill us.

4. Socialize with others. By getting out and with other people, it will create a distraction from your everyday life and it will help to find people that will help you to deal with your distress in a positive way. It's been found that those that belong to a religious organization tend to suffer from less distress than those that don't. Though, there are many ways one can socialize and that's only one. Others include volunteering activities, social clubs, attending seminars and classes, or going to a local Meetup.com event.

5. Self-Care, Self-Care, Self-Care. I can't tell you enough that self-care is important in every area of your life. Doing so will help to eliminate distress in your life and those around you. It could be a walk in nature, a massage, going to a spa, or any activity that lets you know that you matter. Just do it.

Distress doesn't have to be a big part of your life. It will always be there. It's just how you deal with it that counts. When you do these five things, you'll notice your stress start to reduce plus you'll be healthier and happier.

Check out Optimal Life Seminars today! Just go to optimallifeseminars.com for learning and more... Watch for upcoming events and seminars...

Bob Choat works as a Peak Performance Coach & Trainer and is focused on people in every industry reach a higher level in their lives.

Call 818-620-2494 for coaching/training

bobchoat.com


Original article

7 Ways to Relieve Stress: Increase Creativity, Be Kind to Yourself, and Feel Good

There's stress relief and then there are powerful ways to relieve stress. If you're sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, discover a few colorful ways to be kind to yourself, increase creativity, and feel good.

1. Put the Hammer Down
How much for your stress comes from beating yourself up? Many of us carry an imaginary hammer to clunk ourselves over the head. Imagine having someone kick you every time you made a mistake. That would be painful and you'd ask them to stop. Now, I'm asking you to stop. Allow yourself to explore your humanity. You will make mistakes. It is o.k. So gently put the hammer down. No clunking or kicking... please.

2. Live In this Moment
Where is your mind wandering? Are your thoughts in the past, present, or future? One of the ways you can relieve stress is to live in this moment. Right here. Don't dwell on yesterday or stress about tomorrow. This moment and only this one... is promised to you. Hug your children as through it's the last hug. Stare at the blue sky as if it's the last time you'll see it. When you do, everything around you feels even more precious.

3. Take a Nap
It sounds silly, but few people do. It's a part of my life, every Sunday at 2. You may think, "Napping ruins productivity." Quite the opposite, napping boosts energy and increases creativity. If you've ever had a problem you couldn't solve, take a nap. It's the fastest way to go from stuck to "on a roll!"

4. Get Out
If you're spending 6, 8, or 10 hours a day at your desk, it's time to get out. Go for a stroll, take a walk, or sit on a bench. Leave your desk at lunch. Give yourself a change of scenery. When you leave your work setting for just a few moments, you can relieve stress and gain a fresh perspective. Here's to celebrating the outdoors!

5. Start Laughing
Everyone loves funny but few of us laugh... often. Give yourself the gift of story. Find a friend, share a story, and watch the laughter appear. No stories to share? See an old movie or grab a new one, just make sure it's funny. From me to you, see Baby Boom with Diane Keaton, it's a classic.

6. Explore Some Virtual Travel
Take a trip to your local book store, buy a cup of coffee, and flip through a few travel magazines. Where would you like to visit? What sites would you like to see? Imagine yourself there. You're sharing the foods, exploring the culture, and connecting with a few new friends. Best of all, there's no need to pack or check baggage at the airport. And it's all for the price of a cup of coffee.

7. Get Your Hands Dirty
Whether you play in the dirt in your garden, or play with paints in your garage, your heart smiles when you get your hands dirty. The heart and hands have a powerful connection. Your hands stimulate your mind and make your heart and soul feel... alive.

With a little imaginative thinking you can relieve stress, increase creativity, and feel good. Here's to a few simple, yet powerful ways to encourage you to be kind to yourself.

Copyright 2011. Asia Sharif-Clark. All rights reserved.

I'm Asia Sharif-Clark. In 90 days, I take women from overworked and overwhelmed to relaxed and energized. And, that's just the beginning. Enjoy a free gift: "26 Love Lessons for your Heart & Soul" http://www.centeredselfworldwide.com/


Original article

Two Strategies to Ease Stress and Suffering

The Holiday season is upon us and that brings social and familial commitments. With these commitments, there is an increase in conflict and stress. We are aware it will happen and promise to ourselves not to let it get us this year. What follows will provide two necessary strategies for handling any conflict or stressful situation during this Holiday season, and it will begin to reduce suffering in our lives if practiced with genuine integrity.

Conflict or stress is a form of suffering. Suffering is a direct result of expectations not being met. It emerges from interactions between us and the world.* In these interactions, suffering is a result of not acknowledging what you can effect change in or in essence, control. We do not recognize that what the world is and what aspects of our experiences in the world are not within our control. In our experiences in the world, what is in our control is how we react to that encounter and how we perceive the experiences in the world; this is all that is within our grasp to effect change in and control. What does this mean? I can control or effect change in my reaction to the encounter or situation. I can also control or effect change in how I perceive the conflict or stressful encounter in the world, as well as how I perceive the world itself. This is it. I cannot control any other aspect of the encounter or experience. What the other says, I cannot control. What the other does, I cannot control. What the world is I cannot control. Simple really, we want to avoid or eliminate conflict and stress, thus ease suffering during the holidays; so, acknowledge what we can control and accept what we cannot control is the simple solution to reducing conflict and stress, thus easing suffering.

Consider any stressful experience you encounter in life or during the holiday season. With that or any experience, our role in any encounter is all that we can control. Reducing conflict and stress begins with accepting what we can control and applying two strategies for change. We must become aware of what we perceive in our experiences in the world and how we react in our encounters and experiences. This is not easy, but it is possible with sincerity and integrity. Take a particular action against another or a judgment made by a person about someone else. There are two events occurring in this encounter or experience in the world. The first is the perception of the judgment by the person and second, our reaction to the judgment by the person. The two strategies are what our attention must address. Effecting change in our perceptions of our experiences in the world and effecting change in our reactions to those encounters are the two strategies for reducing conflict and stress.

Apply these two strategies by asking, with sincerity and integrity, a few fundamental questions.

• "Do I judge others?"
• "What is it about the world that I believe that leads me to make this judgment?"
• "How can I react to this judgment?"

When making a judgment, we justify it from a principle about what the world is that we believe or endorse. Our beliefs about what the world is differ; but, our different beliefs about what the world is differ from what the world is independent of our beliefs about what the world is. The actual questioning of "What is it about the world..." initiates the change of what we perceive the world to be. What we perceive is what we want. To change what we perceive, we must change want we want. When reacting to an encounter, our reaction appears to be instinctual, but it is a habit and habits can be changed. The actual questioning of "How can I react..." begins the change of how we react. How we react is what we perceive. To change how we react, we must change what we perceive. Once we recognize and acknowledge what is in within our control, we then start to see how what we believe the world is not necessarily what the world is independent of our beliefs of what the world is. These strategies of grasping what we perceive the world to be and how we react in encounters and experiences allow us to handle any conflict or stressful situation and even ease the suffering in our lives.

*The world is to be understood as the ultimate setting for all experience: past, present, and future.
**This is a simple idea to eliminate suffering in your life that most all ancient texts, philosophical, religious and otherwise, mention.


Original article

Stress Management - Forgetting Where You Put Things Last Is an Indicator That Stress Is Not Managed

Stress that is not managed can have many symptoms, one is forgetting were you put things or where you put them down last. Here are some ideas that will help.

Stress has been known to cause absent-mindedness and forgetting. We just have too many things going on at the same time. We lose track of thoughts, ideas and tangible things like pens, eyeglasses and keys.

This problem is very frustrating and increases your stress levels even more. This becomes a stress cycle. You start worrying that you are getting a memory disorder disease or something. Your focus on a project is decreased and you feel miserable.

Here are a few suggestions. Make a deliberate mental note of where you temporarily put that pen, tool, pair of reading glasses or piece of paper.

The option is to have to retrace your steps or thoughts to find that something. This is not easy; since it is usually, a distraction that made you lose focus and made you set it down in the first place.

The result is wasted time and productivity and when you are extremely busy or in a time crunch, this is a disaster. Now after a few tries you will get a knack of remembering where things are.

One additional tip is to avoid bringing a tool you were working with away from the work area; it will usually be unwittingly left behind.

You may think that it would be much easier just to purchase duplicate items and extras. This practice can get very expensive. When you are stressed, you may even forget where you put the duplicates. This is only repeats the stress cycle.

Now, removing the source of the problem to begin with is a great step. Remove or reduce the distraction.

If you work from home or have a bit of control at where you work you can reduce distractions very effectively. Turning off the ringer on a phone, closing a door, turning off your e-mails, asking family or co-workers to not interrupt you during certain times of the day. You can get co-operation if you explain the importance of your project or assignment.

Becoming consistent and somewhat routine when it comes to your tools and personal items, the way you manage their use and the storage of the items makes a big difference in your level of stress. This habit of putting things in their place is a positive habit to develop.

These suggestions and ideas on how to not forget where you put things down will reduce your stress and increase your overall productivity in your work and in your life.

Ellen R Norman is an expert in stress management using natural solutions.
She teaches people like yourself how to regain control of your life by reducing and relieving stress.
Visit http://www.stressmanagementnaturalsolutions.com/ and subscribe to get your newsletter and a free gift.


Original article

Physical Order - Rest

Rest - relief or freedom, esp. from anything that wearies, troubles, or disturbs. A period or interval of inactivity, repose, solitude, or tranquility: to go away for a rest. Mental or spiritual calm; tranquility.

You just read the definition of rest. Rest is an important part of the lifestyle of order, and organization. Everyone need to stop and take the time to slow down, and rest their physical body, as well as rest their mind. You cannot continue to go at a non - stop pace, without your body, and your life speaking to you telling you it is time to rest. Taking a vacation, and even doing something you truly love to do can bring you into a place of rest. Your home should be a place of rest, peace, and tranquility,

- Chaos in the home goes against the law of order, which is necessary to be able to rest in your home. An unorganized home is not the place where you can rest. It causes you to be uneasy, and overwhelmed, not able to rest, and have the peace that the lifestyle of order gives you. Our creator created six days to work, and one day to rest. Just that truth should tell you that rest is necessary. Rest helps you to rejuvenate, and regroup.

- Getting a proper's night sleep also helps you to come to a place of rest. You cannot function without a proper night sleep, and allowing our body, and mind that time to rest causes us to be more clear in our thinking, as well as equipped to handle, and deal with what is going on throughout our day.

Without rest you can wear your body down, and decrease your body's immunity. To be your best make sure rest is a priority in your life. You cannot be productive without rest, and when you are not well rested you become irritable, and not at your optimum best. Recently I had to stop, and slow down myself to rest. I was running on fumes, and had run out of gas. It took me a few days rest to get back to that place of where I could function at my best. I enjoyed my time of rest, because in that time I was able to be still, and enjoy a time of solitude. I took the time to just enjoy being home, and not here, there, and everywhere. I welcomed my time to rest, and look forward to doing it again.

For those of you who are workaholics, and find it challenging to slow down, and stop. You will find it difficult to allow a time of rest. I suggest you start with taking one day at a time off, maybe make it a long weekend, or choose a day in the middle of the week. Just give yourself the time you need to rest. Allow yourself to enjoy your day off, sleep in longer, do something you love that brings you to a place of rest. Pamper yourself, do something to take care of you, because you will be better able to take care of others. When you make the decision to rest. Do not allow anyone, or anything to interrupt your time of rest with activity. The object of rest is to get away from activity, and to flow in a more peaceful, slower pace. Don't deny yourself a time of rest, it helps you to be the best you can be when you rest. May you have a blessed, and great time of rest, you cannot afford not to do so. It is not only important, but necessary to your total wellbeing.

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Original article

Fears And Worries - What To Do When They Overwhelm You

Due to the current plight the world now faces, fears and worries are a constant in our day-to-day lives.

When I look back at my professional rugby playing career I constantly had to deal with the burdens of fear and worry.

After a spate of injuries early in my career, I then carried around this incessant fear and worry of getting more serious injuries that could potentially curtail my career.

Rugby was my life and I learned in the early days that the biggest obstacle to me achieving what I wanted in the game was injury, hence the fear and the worry of it actually happening.

This may sound crazy to you, but this was the way things were for me.

It wasn't a case that I was lacking commitment and courage during games... that would have been fatal to my career. It was just that I expended so much energy on this worthless exercise in the days leading up to games, my performances inevitably suffered.

What this behavior also did was set in motion the universal law of cause and effect which is something that can we can discuss at another time.

Fear and worry are debilitating behaviors that not only affect your career, but also your quality of life and general health and well-being.

As well as leaving you anxious, agitated, panicky and stressed, it can also strip you bear of your inherent spirit, fight and energy.

In a quest to improve our lives, fear and worry have no benefit or value whatsoever, but unfortunately they're now an ever-present foe in our daily lives.

So what are the best ways to deal with constant fears and worries that we seem to be confronted with on a daily basis?

Below are a few techniques you can use today to help ensure fear and worry does not overwhelm you and take hold of your life:

Live In The Present Moment

Quite often what we fear is totally blown out of proportion by our very selves.

Some time ago I read that over 85% of what we worry about never happens.

So if that's true why do we waste so much time doing it?

Well, it's what we're used to. It's part of our make-up.

Human behaviors are habitual, and fear and worry are habits that lots of us have difficulty shaking off.

We have to remember that worrying achieves nothing constructive... In fact, it just makes us feel worse.

All the worrying in the world will not change anything.

The thing you have to do is to always live in the present moment. Don't have regrets about the past...that time is gone. Don't worry about the future... instead, do your best in the present moment, through both your thoughts and actions, and the future will then take care of itself.

Challenge Your Thoughts.

When you experience thoughts of fear or worry, you should immediately challenge them with positive statements and objective thinking.

Your fears and worries are not based on reality they are just your OWN perceptions of the world around you. By asking yourself rational and objective questions you will then gain a better perspective of the real situation

Control What You Can Control

As I mentioned earlier, much of what we worry about never comes true. It also worth noting that lots of what we worry about are often things that are out of our control.

So instead of worrying ourselves sick about things that will never happen or are out of our control, we should best concentrate our thoughts and efforts on things we are able to do and control.

Do Something You Enjoy

Doing something that makes you feel good and happy will get your mind off all the problems that you feel you have in your life.

Also, the real big pay off with doing this is that it triggers off the true workings of the incredible and powerful Law of Attraction.

The Law of Attraction is something that we've written about many times on our site, but basically when you feel good happy it naturally raises your energy levels, which means that you will vibrationally attract more things into your life that make you feel good and happy.

I know only too well how difficult it is to overcome our fears and worries.

It was the bane of my life for many years.

But if you can consistently apply these techniques everyday in all areas of your life then I can assure you that your fears and worries will diminish and eventually disappear forever.

The world has dramatically changed in recent years and life is now more challenging and difficult than ever before. Many people are now burdened with more stress and worry about their futures. Discover a proven formula to end all your fears and worries so you can take control of your life and start achieving all the success and happiness you so richly deserve.


Original article

How to Throw a Stress-Free Holiday Party

Hosting a holiday party sounds fun and festive... until you realize how much preparation and work it entails. Before you stress out or decide to cancel, here are some tips on how to throw a fun and stress-free holiday bash.

Get a Partner for the Party. Did you ever think of teaming up with a friend to plan and co-host the party with you? Partnering for a party has many benefits. You can split the cost of food and beverages, decorate for the event as a team, and share the guest list. This can be a great way to introduce different circles of friends to one another. Caution: Before picking a partner, be certain that the two of you will get along and have compatible personalities - remember you're trying to reduce stress, not increase it.

Make it B.Y.O.B. The cost to stock a party with plenty of quality beer, wine and liquor can be steep, so take some stress off your pocketbook and make it B.Y.O.B., which stands for "bring your own beer, booze or bottle." From an etiquette viewpoint, it is assumed the hosts will provide food and snacks, but it is completely acceptable to ask people to bring along their favorite libation. Make sure B.Y.O.B. appears at the end of your party invitation, and it is printed large enough so people will notice. Another stress reducing tip: Make it a cocktail party. It will require much less food and planning than a full dinner or formal evening event.

Make a List, and Check it Twice. Planning is the key to a stress-free party. The more prepared you are, the less something unexpected could go wrong, and the more fun you and your guests will have. Create a complete shopping list including the food, drinks and other items you will need for the party, and start shopping well in advance. Nothing creates stress like last minute shopping, or realizing you've blown your budget.

When estimating how much food and drink you will need, consider the number of people invited and how long the party will last. Try to guess what items will be most popular and will go the most quickly. More choices will mean smaller individual portions, and when in doubt, round up. To make a truly memorable event, go for the best quality food and high-end liquor. Again, a partner can help absorb the costs.

Have It Catered - Or Buy Prepared Food. Unless you really enjoy cooking, you probably won't want to be a slave to the oven on the day of your event. If you can afford it, have your party catered by a professional catering company, and consider letting them serve, too. A less expensive option is to buy prepared appetizers, meals and desserts from a quality supermarket. Be sure to call ahead and give them enough time to prepare it. Important to remember: No cooked dishes, soft cheeses, cut up fruits, lunch meats or dips should sit at room temperature for more than two hours, so use chafing dishes and beds of ice or coolers to maintain food temperatures.

Have Guests Serve Themselves. A sure fire way to get worn out at your party is running around in circles serving people all night. Think strategically in your placement of the food and drink tables. For food, set up a buffet area for hors d'oeuvres and/or the main course. Then, place small bowls of nuts, crackers and chips around the room where guests will be sitting. Place the bar in a different area to avoid traffic jams, and provide plenty of ice and open, accessible bottles. Dress up the tables with elegant linens. Make sure you designate an area for dirty dishes and glasses.

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Original article

Visualise Your Peaceful Self Not Your Anxious Self

Current psychological thinking and ancient wisdom tell us that the unconscious mind ignores negatives. Under pressure, if you repeat to yourself silently 'don't blush', your subconscious will only hear the word blush, and you know what happens next. The unconscious mind can't process the "I do not want to..." and so makes you act as if you were saying "I want to..." Therefore if you are predominantly using negatives in your internal thoughts, you will get just what you don't want.

Of all your contemporaries, relatives, contacts and associates, think about the ones you could call high achievers. Are they the cheery, optimistic ones who look for the good in everything? I'll bet they are the happiest. Do the lower achievers grumble about their employment, their boss, their responsibilities, their finances, always blaming everyone else for their problems? I suspect that you'll find this to be generally true. Those who think optimistically are the most content. Or possibly, those who are the most content think optimistically.

This article is not about positive thinking, it is about imagination and focused thinking. We all know from our own experience that it's hard to remain optimistic when you're feeling anxious, or worried. And it's hard to break out of those states to return to positivity. Practically without exception, whatever takes up your thoughts, and dominates your attention, is the thing that you get most of. Return to consider your acquaintances. Does their life reflect what's on their mind most? And you, do you get lots of what you mostly dwell on.

I could cite many real-life illustrations to back up this notion. Those who overcome physical restrictions to live a fulfilling life; people whose persistence and hard work compensate for lack of skill or talent; survivors of deadly illnesses who did so because they were determined to live on; successful inventors who refused to give up on a design. Their ambitions and ideas dominate their thinking, and action naturally follows thought. The victorious overcome uncertainty by focusing unswervingly on what it is that they want, and imagining what life will be like if they have it or achieve it. They do this without consciously knowing they are doing it

So, I believe that the way to address anxiety is not by focusing on anxiety, or calling therapy for it Anxiety Management' or Stress Management. That just loads the dice against success and focuses on the very thing that you are trying to bring under control. And what you focus on you'll get in abundance. Anyone, including yourself, that labels you as an anxious, or nervous, or worried type of person, is making it difficult for you. Don't spend all your time trying not to be anxious. I've realised that how to treat anxiety is by focusing thoughts, imagination and effort on trying to become a calm and composed person. Tranquillity Management would be a better way to describe it.

So redirect your thoughts to those of composure and peace, and if the anxiety starts to arise, don't fight it, neutralize it by refocusing as best you can on being calm. Look for all the methods for achieving tranquillity that you can; there is a lot of literature out there in the marketplace and lots of free advice. You'll have to practice to keep tranquillity at the forefront of your thoughts, particularly when life throws you challenges. But you'll lose nothing by giving it a go and trying to make it a habit. Perseverance pays off in the end.


Original article