Is it just me, or are people crabbier this time of year? I don't think it is just me. The nastiness and rudeness are just the symptoms of "stress." There is so much stress heaped upon us, that sometimes we just allow ourselves to be harnessed in. The next thing you know, we are pulling a load to a cracking whip without realizing we didn't even want to go in that direction.
I was at the grocery store a couple of days ago. I was wearing my sunglasses because I had 3 viral infections in my eye. Not only was it extremely painful, but I was very sensitive to light. My husband can't drive, so I had no choice but run to the store for my prescription.
I was standing in line behind a mother and her cart. She decided to brave the Self-Check-Out line, so I stepped back to let her swing her cart around. Two men then butt into the line in front of me. I wanted to say something, but, I bit my tongue.
The store finally opened another till, so some of us moved over. Now I am standing in line behind a woman berating her husband. When she turns to pay the cashier, she says, "now I know why I never come to town."
Excuse me? I just wanted to smack her. Living at home like a hermit isn't the answer. You need to learn some social skills lady, or you are going to be miserable AND alone soon.
She's not the only one trying to cope with stress, everyone is affected. The sooner we learn how to deal with it, the better.
Here are some quick tips that will help keep you calm, cool, and in control when you feel your voice rising and your shoulders are up by your ears. Plus I threw in a little humour.
Tip #1 Breathe
You might be thinking, "of course I breathe, if I didn't I would be dead." True. But did you know that when we are feeling stressed and tense, we breathe shallower? Sometimes we actually "stop" breathing.
My husband Ken has not been sleeping well at all. His heart has stopped so many times, we are both living on the edge. So a couple of nights ago, I was really worried we would end up at emergency again, so I couldn't sleep. He finally fell asleep, and that is when I noticed something very scary! He would actually "stop" breathing for about 4 of my breaths. Then he would start breathing deeply again, slowly tapering off shallower until he would stop altogether. Very unnerving. Another thing we will be traipsing to the doctor about. But that, no doubt, is from stress.
There is a magical solution to reduce stress...."deep breathing." It is best to lie down if you can, but if you can't, just do it standing. Inhale through your nose, counting to 5. Direct your air to the bottom of your abdomen first, then up your chest. Kind of like blowing air into the bottom of the balloon first.
Hold and count to 3. Then exhale fully from your mouth, counting to 5. Push out as much air as you can. Continue to breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.
Tip #2 Smile
Smiling actually changes your mood. It tricks your body because it releases endorphins (natural pain killers) and serotonin (natural uppers). Your blood pressure drops when you smile. Also, your wrinkles now become smile lines, what's not to be happy about that!
Tip #3 Simplify
Look at tangible and physical ways to relieve your stress. Look for shortcuts. Whenever I do my house cleaning and I vacuum the corners or wipe some spots on the wall, Ken calls that "spring cleaning." This is not the time for spring cleaning. This is the time for "lick-and-a-promise."
Everything does not have to be perfect, nor does everything have to be home-made. If you are feeling stressed, then it is not fun, and it just not worth it.
Tip #4 "Make" Time For Yourself
Moms, dads, care givers... listen up. If you are feeling overwhelmed, tired and stressed, then it is time for some "self-care."
When Ken permanently retired over 15 years ago, I found we were together 24-7. Sounds like fun, and for the most part it was. But as his caregiver, it also meant I was on "red alert" 24-7. When my nerves were shot and my hair started falling out in patches, I knew something was wrong.
The solution.... time alone. It is like water to a plant. Time to just think, do what you want, or just do nothing. It can transform you from Jeckyl & Hyde to Cinderella!
So play hide-and-seek with your kids. You hide.... and make sure you hide "damned" good!
Tip #5 When Momma Is Happy.... Everybody Is Happy
The most important tip. Teach this to your children from "infancy!"
Elvie Look: Is your Professional Organizing Coach who is helping people get organized with her easy tips and suggestions. These systems help the busy mom, businessman or woman, entrepreneur or student learn the keys to organizing in simple, actionable & manageable steps. She teaches how to get organized & maintain your organized space while carrying on your normal busy life. She is the author of "21 Steps From Chaos To Calm" & "One-A-Day Organizing Tips, & "The Relax Without Guilt Video Series." http://elviesessentials.com/
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